The issue is dependency. Self-pity is the opposite of self-esteem. It arises because you feel no one will lift you out of your difficulties. With no one stronger, older, wiser and kinder to help you, there's a tremendous sense of lack.

What is the source of self-pity?

The combination of negative thinking and inactivity fuels further feelings of self-pity. Mentally strong people recognize when they're at risk of becoming caught in this downward spiral and they take action to prevent themselves from living a pitiful life. Our emotional state influences how we perceive reality.

Is self-pity a form of pride?

Self-pity is the response of pride to suffering. ... Boasting says, “I deserve admiration because I have achieved so much.” Self-pity says, “I deserve admiration because I have sacrificed so much.” Boasting is the voice of pride in the heart of the strong.