If you say that someone has been put through the wringer or has gone through the wringer, you mean that they have suffered a very difficult or unpleasant experience.

What does it mean to be through the wringer?

informal. : through a series of very difficult or unpleasant experiences Those poor people have really gone/been through the wringer lately. They were put through the wringer by the adoption agency.

Can you not put through a wringer?

put (one) through the wringer

To subject one to some ordeal, difficulty, trial, or punishment; to force one to undergo an unpleasant experience.